Tactical Things

Unbreakable umbrella frames are warranted not to break under normal use (no throwing it under a heavy truck or a train, no chopping it with an axe, no banging it with a hammer, no throwing it into a wood chipper, no setting it on fire, or subjecting to other abuses). This warranty does not cover fabric, nor does it cover damage caused by abuse or accident (such as throwing it under a train or a bulldozer, and subjecting it to other similar unreasonable stresses). Should the frame of this umbrella break under normal use (whatever is normal for the strongest walking stick, police baton, and an umbrella, of course), please send it to Never-Thought-of-It Enterprises, P.O. Box 335, Island Pond, VT 05846. Please include your original sales receipt, your address, phone number, description of defect, and $10.00 for shipping. Never-Thought-of-It Enterprises will repair or replace the umbrella at its discretion.